Resume Schmesume....

If you're searching for a job in this economy I'm sure your email is bombarded with tons of legit and not quite so legit job search engines.  I swear, I should probably try to get a job being a job search engine operator.  It seems like every Tom, Dick & Harry has a new one out there these days.  If you sign up for one they tend to pimp out your email address to others & before you know it you're getting tons of MLM, Get Rich Quick schemes & make millions by reading emails with no experience in anything... I don't know what kind of socially inept email list I managed to get myself on, but I'm not amused.

But I'm going to get off my soap box about scam emails and "find the right job for you while you wear pajamas & eat ice cream" job offers.  I'm going to talk about the perfect resume...

What?  The perfect resume?  Does that even exist?  It seems everyone wants to tell me something different every day.  It should all fit on one page, use bullet points, don't use bullet points, tell about your achievements at previous positions, tell about your actual duties, don't tell about your duties... so on and so forth.  NOW we come to the biggie, these so-called professional resume writers.  Sign up on any of the big 3 job search sites (TheLadders.com, Monster.com, Careerbuilder.com) and when you upload your resume they'll automatically "critique" that resume and then give you feedback on how that resume could better serve you if you paid them to rewrite it for you.

These services range anywhere from $99 to almost $400.  I opted for the latter because I had been unemployed for 3 months at the point I got my tax return & decided that I haven't been getting any calls from my resume submissions... what would it hurt?  Well, they did a pretty good job piecing together a new resume for me that got the attention of recruiters & HR managers. BUT they only actually spoke with me once & didn't really work with me regarding my short term contract position that I held last year. 

Plus, get this... for $395 the girl that rewrote my resume couldn't even cut & paste my contact information.  When I received the email with the resume attached I only looked at the bullet points & condensed self promotion for each position.  I made the ASSUMPTION that the resume writer would have at least gotten my contact information correct since it was on the original resume.  Nope, wrong!!  In fact, I had been using the resume with the wrong email address on it for months.  A prospective employer was the one that pointed out that an email they were sending to confirm an in person interview had bounced, my email had been incorrect...

So, I did what every red-blooded American would do.  I demanded a refund, of the full amount, based solely on a typo that showed on my resume twice (apparently she couldn't copy/paste from MY resume but she was capable of copy/pasting from her own error).  I truly wasn't expecting one, I was figuring they would hem & haw about it and offer partial refund or extended subscription to their site.  Boy, was I blown away that they offered & actually refunded the money within 2 days of my request. THAT is customer service at its best.

Now, if I could get them to actually find me a job within a decent driving distance... I'd be even happier.